Vermont Northern Lights Career Development Center

Re-examining Negging

Not one to be close minded, I decided to re-examine negs. And from reading some of Mystery’s newer stuff, I can see that he didn’t intend for the neg to be insulting. The problem is that he wasn’t clear the first time around, and as a result, negging has become synonymous with insulting women. There really is no way to escape that. If you’re out in the field, and you watch the vast majority of men trying to neg, then you know that most men end up insulting women and either scaring them off, pissing them off, or making them feel incredibly insecure.

Now, as I understand it, Mystery meant that you should tease the girls women. However, if you’ve read any of his recent stuff, then you will see that he uses negging as too broad of a term. For instance, not looking at a girls women while she is talking can be considered negging. Talking over a girls women can be considered negging. Acknowledging everyone but the girls women can also be considered negging. In other words, he makes negging synonymous with too many types of actions, thus confusing men, and resulting in a lot of men insulting women and scaring them off.

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I think that he should have just broken down all of those actions and labeled them TYPES of negs. For instance, he could have had the playful tease-neg, the ignore-neg, and the judgement-neg (I’m making up random names). I think that by individually labeling the negs, he would have avoided a lot of confusion. That way if a guy were to say “I called a girls women ugly” or “I told a girls women that she wasn’t hot”, he could respond with “what type of neg is that? Because it doesn’t fit into any of the categories that I created.”. And I don’t know, maybe he as already done this(?).

So where do I stand with negs? I am still not going to promote them as a necessity. Why not? Because they are not necessary if you have your confidence built up. I think that teasing and all of that stuff shouldn’t be used as a means to an end. Like routines, negging should only be something that you layer on top after you are very comfortable using your confidence and natural conversation ability to get women; very much in the same way routines should be used.

As long as you rely on crutches, you will always be an insecure guy, and I’m not here to help men cover up their insecurities. Most men who use negs and routines, use them to cover up their lack of confidence and conversation ability, hence, why they tend to overdo it. Instead of using negs and routines to ENHANCE their interactions with women, they use negs and routines as a means to distract women from their lack of confidence and inability to hold a decent conversation.

Become comfortable using your confidence and natural conversation ability to pull women first, and THEN start layering routines and non-aggressive negs on top of who you are as a person. You will see that if you start relying on routines and negs right out of the gate, you will tend to overdo it and depend on them more than you should. However, if you just use your confidence, and natural conversation ability, then you will use non-aggressive negs and routines sparingly, thus removing your dependency on them and making yourself a more attractive man overall.